Friday, October 31, 2008

I have no scary party to attend. Boo...

Happy Halloweeen!!

In celebration of our favourite costume-donning, black cat avoiding, hooked-nosed witching day, i felt like throwing up a list and what better list than:

The Top 20 Most Annoying Horror Movie Cliches!
(courtesy of Listaholic.com)

1. Instead of rushing out the door, victims run upstairs and effectively trap themselves inside the house with the killer.

2. The victims could all be track stars, and the killer will somehow still catch up with them without so much as a brisk walk.

3. Strange noises/glow/movements outside the house? Trust the victim to investigate all by herself the source of the commotion in her nighties or underwear.

4. The door is always stuck when a protagonist is fleeing the killer. And then, just when the killer is a foot away and has raised his hatchet/machete to strike, the door opens and the supposed victim narrowly escapes.

5. Women who are being chased almost always fall down, then wait until the killer is almost on top of them before getting up and running again.

6. The hot girl, especially one who has displayed big breasts in an earlier sex scene, always gets killed first

7. “Stay here”, so the hero wannabe tells his girl as he tries to look for and take down the killer by his lonesome. Then it’s either he or the girl he left behind gets chopped to pieces.

8. Since when did the sound of children singing become scary?

9. Cars always break down, no matter how brand new or well-oiled it is. And similar to no. 4, the engine comes to life at the last second and the protagonists make their escape.

10. No grown-up ever believes the frightened kids, until it’s too late.


11. Ominous sound and music, character gets really spooked and a cat suddenly jumps into the frame.

12. Usually, a female character is alone in a certain place, scared shitless knowing there’s a killer on the loose, then somebody, who turns out to be a friend or a boyfriend, just grabs her shoulder from out of nowhere and almost gives her a heart attack.

13. One minute only the victim is reflected in a mirror, usually one on a medicine cabinet, and the killer’s reflection is suddenly there when the victim closes the cabinet.

14. The victims almost always split up purportedly to “cover more ground”, and end up being taken out by the killer one by one. It’s safe to assume they’ve never heard of the saying “there’s strength in numbers”.

15. Real people run like hell when some killer is chasing after them. Characters in horror movies tend to keep looking behind them while running at full speed and end up stumbling and falling, then eventually getting murdered in the process.

16. The killer lies prone after being shot by the protagonists, who then check out the killer's body, only to have the killer come back to life and jump on them. What's wrong with a few well-placed rounds in the head before approaching the body?

17. Scary messages scrawled in red on a mirror.

appropriated from this website

18. Minorities almost always never survive the movie

19. The corpse, or part of a corpse of a friend or a colleague always falls on the other surviving characters and scares them out of their wits.

20. The killer always lives again, or at least shows some sign of life, at the end of the movie in preparation for yet another sequel.

Come on, you know you were moaning 'oh gawd, that's so true' while reading that. Hope you have a spooky halloween! And guys, do remember to:


Much credit for this post is due to Someecards.com, Listaholic.com and the random picture from Scootutopia

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Flippin 'Eck, it's Dolphins!

I'm quite chuffed at myself for being able to catch the jumping one on camera. =)

School of dolphins in the Maldives from a speedboat!

Saturday, October 25, 2008

A Photo Journal of the Maldives - The Amazing Blue

And so the adventure begins, armed with my trusty devillish ipod as we boarded the KLIA Express together. Saturday the 18th October - 5 pm.
I skipped the bits about my flight being delayed 4 hours and changing planes and arriving in Male at 1 am and then taking the ferry from the airport to the capital (the airport is on a separate island!) and going to bed at 3 am and waking up at 6 am for a 4 hour speedboat ride. Instead, let us be amazed at how gorgeously blue the water is. Sunday the 19th October. Around 9 am. Stopped by an island to pick up some documents. I couldn't resist snapping this boy on his bike.And a fishing boat. Naturally.
I also skipped the bits about the island chief and co coming to welcome us at the jetty. And then sit around under the shade of a tree on foldout deck chairs to sip on tiny coconuts. (it was the thought really, seeing as we had a bit of a language problem)
After lunch we ventured out on speedboat headed towards an island when lo and behold (it's not very clear here) but we came across a school of dolphins! Like.. a SCHOOL. There must've been at least 30 swimming around us. Darn those critters are hard to photograph. But totally AMAZING.
I understand this is a terrible photo of me and it's impossible to look good when wind is slapping in your face. But as one of maybe 2 with me in it, i shall take it as proof that I WAS THERE.I simply cannot stress how gorgeously blue the water is. Cannot be captured by my humble Canon.Sorry. You have to put up with my so-called artistic shots.
This island was a shell-collecters haven! Although a once-in-a-lifetime chance, i kind of felt i rather leave the shells alone. Which i regret, mildly.
But i tried pestering some crabs instead (can you spot them?) They kept scuttling away the nearer i tried to get.
People. Blue seas. Shell collecting.
More artistic shots. The sky and the sea. Amazing! (this word may be repeated often)
Macro plant shot. But really, it sort of looks like a cabbage!
There was an abandoned house there which suggests someone once lived here. Or maybe it's a summer home?
Oooo... Tea time! From L-R top row: coconut kueh thing, tuna puff, bananas, tuna balls, more coconut kueh stuff (then it repeats)
From L-R bottom row: tuna patties, bananas, french toast thing, coconut kueh thing, more tuna balls! [do you see a trend? their food tends to revolve around tuna and coconuts]
And to defend the point that this was a work trip, here's a community meeting.And the point of the trip is the greenhouse project that we are funding. I work for the orange hand....Sweet melons which are grown in the greenhouses via a hydroponics system.
It's really interesting - the melons have the texture of apples but taste like honeydew. A definite winner in my books.I was very taken by the leaves of this tree. ALL of them are heart-shaped!
[excuse the mushiness... for you, aaron!]
The farmers off to do their thang.
I was also very taken by these goalpost like seats. They are UBER comfortable. And so simple! So there, ikea!

Breakfast in the ONLY RESTAURANT on the island. It opens if and when you call in advance. So the blue bowl on the right is tuna curry, the top plate has chapatti, the closer plate has some sort of coconut bread, right behind it is flaked tuna and coconut and the yellow quarter on the saucer is egg! You didn't think i was serious about the tuna and coconut, right? This is Monday, the 20th October, by the way.
We did spend some time sitting outside our guesthouse (that's it, btw), 'cos it's cooler on the deck chairs outside than in. And were contemplating a quiet day in seeing as it was drizzling all morning.. but there were so damn many mosquitoes
And so we took to the seas once again. Motion sickness over annoying, hot, humid mozzies. (But actually the motion sickness pills worked a charm. I will swear by Novomin)
This is one of my favourite shots. And to me, the best island we stopped at in the Maldives. I fully appreciated how lucky I am to be able to be on an island practically all to myself. And nothing but blue seas and blue skies all around. Gosh, completely understand why rich people have private islands now.
Seriously. where in the world can you find a beach this gorgeous. Empty! There'd be at least an obnoxious surfer or sunbather spoiling the view. I failed to mention, the Maldivian government only allows tourists to go to the capital, Male, and to the resorts. So i am seeing something really precious!
Artsy shot. Sorry.
I think the children are adorable. And their mothers tend to walk them to their school. Even though it's just down the road. (literally)
Another community meeting. (i was working, honest!)
So this is right after night fishing which was the most... mm... nauseating experience. I did want to try my hand at it but was having a hard time doing anything other than stopping from puking. The rolling waves were not very kind. (but to my credit i DID keep all my lunch in) Sitting on the deck of the boat was an awesome experience though. The best (and neverending) roller coaster ride I'd ever sat on!
I can only describe to you the most amazing thing owing to a lack of camera at the time. There were green specks of light as the waves broke and they were the prettiest thing. Like stars in the sea! Upon further research (googling) it turns out they are tiny lifeforms that have some sort of chemical in them that makes them glow. So beautiful though.
Oh, there was scarcely space above to mention the fire is fuelled by coconut husks! (waste not, want not) They burnt it down into embers (like the purple glow above) and smoked our fish. It released this beautiful burnt coconut scent...
That is REALLY fresh fish. (And they also served it to us with a bit of coconut to enhance the chilli that they put on the fish)
I just loved this scene in the morning. Felt a bit of a voyeuristic paedophile but isn't it lovely how they ride to school in their full school uniforms? I just HAD to take this picture. On Tuesday, the 21st of October.
Which incidentally, was also the day we bid Kendikulhudhu goodbye.
And again, the lovely people sent us off and gave us presents! I got a little handmade boat (they local boat is called a dhoani) and a bag of sea almonds. They taste sort of like kuaci and are produced in the village itself. I was touched. Talk about souvenirs money can't buy!
Them at the jetty. Toodleoo Kendikulhudhu!
One stop on our bumpy 4 hour ride back. (Btw, really bumpy speedboats hurt your bum) This bay in Naifaru had the most ridiculously blue waters! It looks like a plastic boat in a bathtub!
Okay okay. This is where I have to admit to a degree of indulgence. Turns out our guy on the ground has an uncle that owns this resort. I would SO love to be able to enjoy the resort side of the Maldives. There are water bungalows and if you rent one of them you can pretty much do what you want in the little lagoon area that they form. The Maldives also has really great water sports - para sailing, sea kayaking/canoeing, brilliant scuba diving, night fishing, snorkelling, jet skiing, sailing (from what i can remember). And very yummy melons, of course.
I was just glad to be able to spend about half a day lying by the sea and realising that I'M IN THE MALDIVES.

And that leads us to the 22nd of October when we went to the UN office in Male and I got to brag about being there for a little bit. Followed by a walk around the capital (of which i took no pictures because it was obvious enough I was a tourist)
What i can remark on is that the streets are very narrow that they almost all feel like back alleys. And what struck me the most was that the street corners (which in effect means the building corners) are ROUNDED. What a very brilliant idea. Once you see how much space it saves and how the cars are able to make much tighter turns, you wonder why all street corners aren't rounded!
That, a seafood buffet dinner and the ride back to the airport where our plane took off just over the seas.

And this is where my adventure ends. There were other bits but either i failed to catch them on film, or you know, you can just ask me yourself. I would recommend the resort bit of Maldives for honeymooning couples and water sport buffs. But the price is also very nice.
Am i lucky to have been there?
Absolutely.

I don't mind all the mosquito bites, sea sickness, flight delays, and sore bums from bumpy speedboats because the trade off of private islands, a truly village existence, island hospitality, dolphin spotting and so so many great experiences are just something money can't buy.

And i do hope you can put aside your envy and still be my friend. =)

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Hello from Male!

i just wanted to get a kick out of international blogging.
So here i am saying Hello! from the UN office in the Maldives.
1) I'm in a UN office(?!?!)
2) I've been in the Maldives for 5 days now!
3) I saw dolphins!
4) I went on a Lost- resembling remote island
5) I am very very lucky indeed!!

Many many photos to be up soon. (Unfortunately I am in close to none of them. Pitfalls of being the photographer)

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Maldives Ho!

Okay, you will say i am a complete bitch when i tell you that I am going to the Maldives and that the picture above was taken there.


Then again, i live in Malaysia and the resorts here look like this

but i hardly see them now, do i?


So, before you all cry that I am SOOOO Lucky (which i am, really) and i'm just there for a holiday, let me stress.

THAT, up there, is what a RESORT looks like. I am NOT going to a resort. I will be going to a tiny island called Kendhikolhudhoo that is 6.5 km wide and 4.8 km long (according to Wikipedia).

[Think about that. The highway between Ipoh and KL is 50 times longer.]

The distance from the airport to Kendhikolhudhoo is over 100 km and i will be traversing that on SPEEDBOAT. Haha.. Last time i was seabound i puked for an hour each way out and back. So yes, motion sickness pills are definitely packed!

Anyway, I am still thrilled about getting to travel and I feel it is my solemn duty to impart some newly-gained knowledge about the Maldives. I present to you,

10 Fast Facts about the Maldives

1) The Maldives is just South of Sri Lanka. (haha.. will you think me blonde if i said i didn't know that before?)
2) The national currency is called the Rufiyaa, made out of 100 Laarees. Today it is roughly 13 Rufiyaa to a US dollar.
3) To become a citizen of the Maldives, you MUST be Muslim.
4) The country consists of 1,190 coral islands - 202 of which are inhabited, 87 of which are exclusive resorts. Its total of 300 square km puts it at #8 on the Smallest Countries in the World list!
5) Work days are from Sunday to Thursday and weekends are Friday and Saturday.
6) With 10.97 divorces per 1,000 of the population per year, Maldives is #1 on the Highest Divorce Rates in the World! (Note that 2nd is only 4.63/1000 of the popn and USA is the 3rd)
7) Back in the day when cowry shells were a form of currency, the Maldives literally had money washing up on their shores!
8) If we don't stop emitting greenhouse gases, rising sea levels may cause the whole of Maldives to be submerged!!!

So i couldn't find 2 other facts that were extremely interesting. Oops.
In any case, hope you learnt something new! I promise to take photos and I hope I get round to posting them up. And for those who do care, please cross your fingers for good weather while i'm there. =)

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

My Favourite Celebrity Takes on Sarah Palin

"It's like a really bad Disney movie, 'The Hockey Mom.' Oh, I'm just a hockey mom from Alaska, and she's president," said Damon. "She's facing down Vladimir Putin and using the folksy stuff she learned at the hockey rink. It's absurd."

~ Matt Damon

Bardot pounced on Ms Palin's depiction of herself as a pitbull wearing lipstick, saying she “implored” her not to compare herself to dogs.

“I know them well and I can assure you that no pitbull, no dog, nor any other animal for that matter is as dangerous as you are,”

~ Brigitte Bardot

“I find it quite interesting that a woman who now is running to be second in command of the United States, only 4 years ago had aspirations to be a television anchor. Which is probably all she is qualified to be… Also interesting that she got her passport in 2006.. And that she is not fond of environmental protection considering she’s FOR drilling for oil in some of our protected land…. Well hey, if she wants to drill for oil, she should DO IT IN HER OWN backyard. This really shows me her complete lack of real preparation to become the second most powerful person in this country…Is our country so divided that the Republicans best hope is a narrow minded, media obsessed homophobe?”

~Lindsay Lohan and Sam Ronson

"I also thought that this idea of America first coming from her was kind of strange because she was one of the people who wanted to secede from the United States. She was part of a campaign to secede Alaska from the United States of America. So I’m glad she’s back, putting America first. I also thought it was disingenuous for her to open with her record on the Bridge to Nowhere. When she was running for governor in 2006, she was all for the bridge and once she won she was against the bridge, this was also a woman who wanted books banned. I just find it extraordinary."

~Whoopi Goldberg

RandomThots isn't much of a Republican supporter and even less so a Sarah Palin fan. She does provide a whole treasure trove of female Bushisms though. Haha.. Who would've thought there'd be 2 presidential candidates like that? Oh America, you never disappoint...

Anyway, without further ado, I present, the top 10 dumb Sarah Palin Quotes!

1. "As for that VP talk all the time, I'll tell you, I still can't answer that question until somebody answers for me what is it exactly that the VP does every day?" --Sarah Palin, interview with CNBC's "Kudlow & Co", July 2008 (Watch video clip)

2. "As Putin rears his head and comes into the air space of the United States of America, where– where do they go? It's Alaska. It's just right over the border." --Sarah Palin, explaining why Alaska's proximity to Russia gives her foreign policy experience, interview with CBS's Katie Couric, Sept. 24, 2008 (Watch video clip)

3. "Well, let's see. There's -- of course -- in the great history of America rulings there have been rulings." --Sarah Palin, unable to name a Supreme Court decision she disagreed with other than Roe vs. Wade, interview with Katie Couric, CBS News, Oct. 1, 2008 (Watch video clip)

4. "All of 'em, any of 'em that have been in front of me over all these years." --Sarah Palin, unable to name a single newspaper or magazine she reads, interview with Katie Couric, CBS News, Oct. 1, 2008 (Watch video clip)

5. "They are also building schools for the Afghan children so that there is hope and opportunity in our neighboring country of Afghanistan." --Sarah Palin, speaking at a fundraiser in San Francisco, Oct. 5, 2008

6. "Pray for our military men and women who are striving to do what is right. Also, for this country, that our leaders, our national leaders, are sending soldiers out on a task that is from God. That's what we have to make sure that we're praying for, that there is a plan and that that plan is God's plan." –Sarah Pailn, on the Iraq war, speaking to students at the Wasilla Assembly of God, June 2008 (Watch video clip)

7. "I'll try to find you some and I'll bring them to you." --Sarah Palin, asked by Katie Couric to cite specific examples of how John McCain has pushed for more regulation in his 26 years in the Senate, CBS interview, Sept. 24, 2008 (Watch video clip)

8. "That's exactly what we're going to do in a Palin and McCain administration." --Sarah Palin, elevating herself to the top of the ticket, Cedar Rapids, Iowa, Sept. 18, 2008 (Watch video clip)

9. "I told the Congress, 'Thanks, but no thanks,' on that Bridge to Nowhere." –Sarah Palin, who was for the Bridge to Nowhere before she was against it

10. "I'm the mayor, I can do whatever I want until the courts tell me I can't.'" --Sarah Palin, as quoted by former City Council Member Nick Carney, after he raised objections about the $50,000 she spent renovating the mayor's office without approval of the city council

Taken from this website.

Alright, for any of the US readers that come across this. Please vote Democrats!

Thursday, October 09, 2008

An Arts Attempt at the Credit Crisis

Now all of you that know me will also know that I'm one who can't quite wrap my head around numbers, what more fathom what in the world is going on with the economic system.
So, for the financially-challenged such as myself, here is the first thing that has helped me understand the Subprime Housing Crisis, recently upgraded to the Credit Crisis. (it's a little bit long but engaging because it's a talk show transcript. There's an audio version here too)

For the lazy, and also because it's my habit, the problem in brief (i've colour coded the different actors, so to speak, 'cos it gets confusing):

  • There is a giant pool of all the world's investable money. [If you must know, somewhere in the league of 70 trillion dollars] There are investor vampires whose sole purpose in life is to make more money. Doesn't matter who it's for. Even if it's for the giant pool of money's sake.
  • There are only so many safe loans such as treasury bonds around and they're low-risk, low-return investments. (think around 1-2%)
  • The hungry investor vampires found out that mortgages have an interest rate of 5-7% and this is a faster way to make money. (Generally quite safe too. Banks need to check that you're credit-worthy and, if all else fails, you have the house to fall back on. This in a climate where housing prices only go Up Up Up. So, you either get steady returns of 5-7% a month or an asset that's worth more than when you first assessed it)
  • Hungry investor vampires start snapping up mortgages and brokers get in on the action by buying the mortgages off banks and bundling them into large balls of mortgage loans. The investor vampires then sell shares of these mortgage loan balls to investors like you and me (well, more like yours and my parents).
  • These sell like hotcakes and soon they run out of good mortgages to buy (all the nice credit-worthy people have already been roped in). So, make the pie bigger! The banks lower their criteria for loans that they'll accept from mortgage companies so 'Steady Income and Credible Assets' devolved into 'No income No Assets' and anyone can get a housing loan. (No really,you say how much you have in the bank, they take your word for it, they give you a loan)
  • Problem is, the loans become less reliable, right? But not to worry! If mortgage companies bundle awesome A++ loans (from the reliable payer-backers) with terrible E for Effort loans (from the people who needed cash but didn't need to be dangled a carrot they can't afford), then they'll even out into an A-okay loan. Which investor vampires will still sink their teeth into.
  • This is the crisis bit. Now a few months down the line, the investor vampires realise that lots of people are defaulting and property prices are really going Down Down Down (there's prolly more to this but my arts mind understands so much). They and the banks realise to save their skins they'll pull Out Out Out by tightening the terms on which they'll approve mortgages. (Yes Income, Yes Assets)
  • Which leaves the mortgage ball- bundling broker in a fix. 'Cos he's only the middle man that relies on the bank to snap up his mortgage ball quickly. Now he's stuck with a mortgage ball he can't afford and his own loan to buy that mortgage ball and noone to take either off his hands. Bring on the Death of the Mortgage Broker companies!
  • Recap: Mortgage broker companies go bust. Banks are now stingy. Investor vampires are back to hedging safe low-interest bets (and have to figure out where half of the giant pool of money went). Investors are stuck with either bad loans or a piece of property worth less than what they invested. The homeowners are still paying hefty interest rates and at risk of losing their homes. And that, my dear friends, is what I would call a dilly of a pickle.

I accredit every word of this summary to be the result of reading the abovementioned transcript.


I quite like not having known about all this before. So now my hippie brain goes into overdrive. It asks:

What if?

What if some of the people currently holding mortgages got together and gave up some of their houses but kept the biggest, most convenient house so that they could, at least until they improve their earnings, live and spend communally?

What if people moved back in with their families?

What if investors take the properties that they unwittingly acquired (and i didn't even get into the complicated mess of 'there are lots of investors who bought percentages of different properties in a bundle so it's hard to trace and noone really knows who owns what') and decided, we can't sell the house, so let's rent it out instead. Affordably, might i add.

What if people took more ownership over their investments? So instead of a supposed safe ball of mortgages (and why are they allowed to determine who/what is safe, anyway?) , you actually find out if it's a valid business, or someone's car, or a dairy farmer who says he'll sell x amounts of milk to make your interest payment.

What if we took the giant pool of money and invested it into the environment? Value-adding, so to speak, to industries and existing enterprises so that they reduce emissions and toxic footprint. It's slower returns, but we'll have quality products, quality environment, longer lifespans all around! I don't think this will be an idea that will appeal to the capitalistic, though.

What if people invested in microcredit? The most resilient form of credit there is! A credit crisis isn't quite going to kill the business of the mamak man down the road, is it? Quite the contrary... It's actually leading on from that thought of knowing what you invest in and I found a US site called MicroPlace that allows the layman like you and me to invest in microloans. Unfortunately only open to US residents but i do so love the idea...

Right, anyway, ideas of a naive mind. How many of you commerce financial people are writhing in your seats?

I shall wax lyrical another day though.

One reference:

Children can see it, why can't we?

We think that politics are biased and dirty and elections are free and fair in the loosest sense of the words. (Free from morals and Fairly Unsettling?)

In any case, I think it's time we took notice when those shining beacons of innocence that we call children start to notice too. This article struck me as both amusing and indicative of the times we live in.

by Robin Chen Delos Oct 8, 2008, 09:27

A new study refutes the idea that children live in a color- and gender-blind world. The University of Texas at Austin study shows most elementary school-aged children know there has been no female, Black or Hispanic president of the United States. And the reason? Discrimination, according to the children studied, reports online magazine Science Daily.

Over a year before Sens. Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama entered the presidential race, researchers at UTA and the University of Kansas interviewed more than 200 children between the ages of five and 10 about their knowledge and beliefs about U.S. presidents. Researchers found the racially diverse group of children was aware women and minorities have been excluded from the U.S. presidency but thought people of both genders and races should be president, according to results published in the electronic journal Analyses of Social Issues and Public Policy.

Researchers heard some surprising answers when children were asked why only White men have been president. One in four children said it is illegal for women and minorities to serve as president. And while a third of the
children said voters’ racial and gender bias explained the lack of female and minority presidents, a third of the children also said women and minorities lacked the skills to be president.

The outcome of the presidential election might significantly influence children’s attitudes. Dr. Rebecca Bigler, a researcher and professor of psychology at UTA, told Science Daily: “If Obama loses his bid for the presidency, there may be little change in children’s attitudes, but it could fuel their perception that American voters are racially prejudiced … In contrast, if Obama wins, children may believe that exclusionary laws and racial prejudice no longer shape the outcomes of the presidential elections.”
This also speaks about how advanced children under 10 are now! I remember being concerned over which of the Secret Seven was stuck in a cave at that age. In any case, children need to be given more credit than they're due.
(How funny that we used to have brilliant ideas when we were kids but were never listened to, and yet when we have grown up we belittle them just the same) Sometimes, it feels like the only person who gave kids enough credit was Roald Dahl.
So, for the children, if you can - vote Obama.
[Can you tell RandomThots supports the Democrats?]