Thursday, May 20, 2010

Hear Ye Hear Ye

I would just like to let it be known that Yeo's Chicken Rendang (with Chef Wan's face on the tin) is NOT good.

Actually it IS good. As an argument against eating canned meat.

Yes I suppose it is quite gross to be eating something seeping in juices that has been dead for an unknown number of months (or years).

Well, now I know for sure.

Yeo's Chicken Rendang (with Chef Wan's face on the tin) is NOT good.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Dental work is just highly skilled plumbing

After a gap of at least a year, I went to the dentist today and found a disgraceful amount of cavities.
Some filling was necessary.

But as the high-pitched drilling sound was resonating in my head, this scary thought struck me:
Dentists are basically putting mini power tools in your mouth and doing plumbing work.

How is that not scary?

I wanted to paste some picture of dental work being done with power tools.
But googling led me to find that horses' teeth are actually worked on by power tools.

Man.... sucks to be a horse.

Oh, and it just struck me it is my second horsey post in a row. Gee...
I have to share the odd coincidence that after yesterday's post, i drove by 3 trucks of polo horses on the way home.
It was funny because the horses were travelling by car.

Monday, May 17, 2010

Am I a Neighsayer of Cars? Hur hur hur I did not just make that pun...

As I drove to work today, I passed by what looked suspiciously like horse droppings on the road. This is unusual as I live in Kuala Lumpur.


There are no horses in Kuala Lumpur (save perhaps in the zoo, in horse riding centres and at the sultan's palace).


Anyway, I then started fantasizing, as I was stuck in my little metal box, about a time when equine travel was again possible. I mean, the more I thought about it, the more I could frame:


Arguments for Horsey Travel


1) Horses are environmentally-friendlier! They do not give out noxious carbon fumes, only noxious methane gases. Here I shall attempt to get sciencey, so pardon me or skip to next point if bored.

Of course someone else did the math and I just plagiarised it... but credit given where credit's due:http://ezinearticles.com/?Cows-Vs-Cars---The-Methane-Versus-Carbon-Dioxide-Battle&id=2877531

From another page, I found out that a dairy cow produces twice as much as waste as a pony and about 1/6th more than a medium horse. Taking that into account, here's how a horse squares up against your car.

A car on average produces 4100 pounds of CO2 a year

A cow on average produces 220 pounds of methane a year so a horse is at around 183 pounds

However, as a greenhouse gas, methane is 20 times as harmful as CO2! Therefore, in terms of greenhouse harm, a car = 4100 while a cow=4400 and a horse = 3660

Ha! I am still at a win for the horse! But you might want to rethink your consumption of steak for the planet's sake. (also seeing as how there are vastly more cows in the world than there are cars)


2) Fuel economy. Again, more information appropriated from this site:http://fatknowledge.blogspot.com/2005/05/horses-vs-cars.html

Math math math and what you get is that a pony can travel approximately 1.25 miles/pound of feedwhereas a car working on switchgrass fuel (sorry that dude's post was based on one where he discussed this new biofuel made from a grass so that's what he bases his calculations on) will travel 0.83 miles/pound of switchgrass.


3) It's a pony! WHICH LITTLE GIRL DOESN'T WANT A PONY!?!?


4) Horses can be your friends. Or at least that's what i learned from My Little Pony.


5) Horses produce their own substitutes. Never have to pay for a car again... EVER! You will have to have about a year of just feeding and no travel benefits though, i suppose.


6) Used horseshoes can become a fun game of horseshoe toss


7) Horses that turn out exceptionally fast can be invested into horse racing - i hear tell it is lucrative. Then they can be studs when they are older. Can your car get you money for producing fast little heirs?


8) Old horses can become satay or glue. (i did NOT say that *gasp*)


9) Horses can jump fences


10) Horses can keep the grass on your lawn short


11) Horses can snort at your enemies


12) They are just cool and you can give them names like Binky


Horse wins!

However, it would be unfair if i didn't point out that

  • A horse cannot carry a family of four
  • Plus luggage
  • A horse can't travel for much more than 40 km a day (that's just about enough to make it to Klang from KL, for those of us numerically disadvantaged folks)
  • Horses need to eat a lot. All day.
  • Horses poo. And you need to clean that up.
  • Horses are moody. Will your boss let you skip work cos your house was throwing a tantrum?
  • Horses smell horsey. As will your clothes. And your hair. And y0u.

Ah well, perhaps someday my dream will see fruition. We will hark back to the days when men were white knights on big horses and women were swooning over their machodom. But we will be doing it while sipping espressos and talking on our iPhones of course.

Because this has already been full of horses, let me take the opportunity to throw in a fat pony.

photo.jpg

This be my fat pony sent to me by Aaron. (he being an awesome boyfriend *mush mush*)

And this be the comic.

*the picture refuses to scale down for me so if you would be so kind to click 'open in a new page' then you will see it in all its full glory*


It was an appropriate comic, thinks I.

More wonderful fat pony goodness (as well as other great historical stuff) can be found at Kate Beaton's comic site.


You must love her, because I do.


Okay, less ponies and more work! *neigh*!

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Sukan adalah Muhibah

Quickly, while Malaysia is still in the Thomas Cup, I have to share my experience of my first live badminton match. Knowing that in most of the football matches I have watched live, I've always wished there was running commentary and instant replays, I was a little unsure what a live badminton match would be like. The crowd always seems a little crazy on TV and the court might be really far away, will i lose interest halfway?

Well, mum and I thought since the Thomas Cup is in town let's go watch it. Fate would have it that I've got stuff on during the Finals and the Quarters (kiasu watch the best mah, right?) and that may have been a fortunate turn of fate because our Malaysian team looks shaky on their feet at the moment, having lost just the day before our match to Japan. (Japan? Not quite the powerhouse, you would think).

Arriving at the stadium, we passed by the stalls selling food and badminton gear and ambled our way to our seats. Oh, and they gave us a free little Malaysian flag to wave too. Yay Malaysia! Of courseon the way we stocked up on snack food! Pizza, and a hot dog and some really really tasty chips! If you spot Ireland Potatoes anymore, do try their chips with wasabi mayonnaise! Good fat chips are hard to find. It's a bonus that you have seats and are able to enjoy your meal slowly.

The match started pretty on time with Germany and Japan squaring off directly in front of me and Malaysia vs. Denmark in the court next door (which was still relatively near - arguably better to have a bit of a side view). I really pity Germany and Japan because naturally most of the stadium was shouting for Malaysia and even when Chong Wei made his entrance to "Eye of the Tiger" (hahaha we will never tire of that song), the crowd was going crazy with screams of Malaysia Boleh and the whole time the German and Japanese players had to just suck it up, deal with it and continue playing. I suppose that is home country privilege. :P

Have to say that Chong Wei and the pairing of KKK-Tan pretty much breezed through their matches. But it was when it came to our 3rd game that stuff got pretty... haha.. what shall i say, worked up?

In particular i thought this instance was damned funny and particularly 1Malaysia. Our 2nd doubles team (Abdul Malik - Hoon) was playing fairly terribly at one point and they kept dropping really easy points. I mean, against tall Danish players what does one do... feed the shuttlecock really high up, right? (-_-")
I love that the guy sitting behind me shouted 'Ah macam tu la! Mereka pendek aje! Bagi tinggi tinggi mereka tak boleh dapat lah!" hehehe... the crowd was SO agitated by how we were losing easy points!
Then at one stage, a dude sitting quite a few rows behind started shouting "Malaysia! Main la! Bodoh! OOoOoiiII!!!Kick their f*cking ass!!" I glanced behind and saw a superly red-faced Chinese man at the edge of his seat and I think if i had looked closer, I could probably have spotted some veins popping out at his temple. Lo and behold though, after that scolding they actually scored! He kept quiet for the next service and our team lost points again.
Then the guy seated behind me stood up and turned to the angry man and shouted "Bos! Marah lagi bos! Marah lagi!"hahaha.. the whole crowd laughed along and seriously, i kid you not. He shouted again and they won the next few points.
That's teamwork for you! hahaha... There were also lots of heartening Malaysia Boleh chants and I really did feel some sense of camaraderie with all the people I was sitting with. Chatting with the makcik next to me the whole way and we even jaga each other's bags when going out to toilet, etc.

I have to say I have never felt more muhibah in Malaysia than while cheering on our team. The two chubby boys in front of us were soooo involved in the match you could one of the boys' frustration when we dropped shots. He'd flick his wrist and make a loud Tsk noise. And it was quite entertaining to see him praying when our chances of staying in the cup rested on the last few shots by our third singles player Hafiz.
Kudos to him by the way, he played excellently last night and I don't blame him. I think if he had lost there would have been chances of a crowd lynching!
There was also the kompang man decked out in his Malaysia flag outfit. From the stripey pants to the knitted jalur gemilang on his hat, he was really great at encouraging the crowd and players, and i appreciated that he knew when to keep quiet as the game started again.

Anyway, this has been a long play by play, i just wanted to convey that i think sport is such a great nation-building exercise and really, that is worth so much more than all the 1Malaysia ads/songs you could ever put up.
If it worked for South Africa, it can work for us.

Oh, and although i think China will massacre us in the quarters tomorrow,
MALAYSIA BOLEH!!