Wheeee!!!

Passport! Passport! I GOT IT!
I can travel again!

My stupid brother told me to go to Phuket. *frown* (initially i typed bastard but realised the implications of calling your own brother that)
In any case, spending a total of 3 hours on the road and 6 hours waiting in Putrajaya and Damansara offices respectively pays off in the end. (that's just today)

Some stats for general info
Period of time for reissuing : 28 Dec to 30 Jan (1 month, 2 days)
Number of hours on the road : roughly 12 (if not more)
Number of drives to Putrajaya : 6
Number of hours waiting : 16 (if not more)
Number of books read : 4 (no less)
Number of DIFFERENT officers met : 6
Number of DIFFERENT departments referred to : 4
Number of different routes to Putrajaya found : 3

It's been such an effort, I could just kiss my passport. Which is what i proceeded to do...


The story's not over yet, i still have to reapply for my student visa. It expired with my lost passport *snort* which warrants a trip to the Australian Embassy tomorrow morning. Cross fingers it's an easier task.

My only advice is, don't ever lose your passport.

Marriage is like.... Cheese

Marriage is like a ticking time bomb.
This holiday i've heard more about marriage than i have in all my years of life. One family dinner and discussion of 3 impending marriages later, it seems to be eating up my blog.
Well, inspired by James' wonderful story of eating two week-expired cheese, i shall expound to you my thoughts on why Marriage is Cheese.


1) Some people are allergic to cheese. They call it lactose-intolerance. I call it infidelity.
2) Shopping for cheese is difficult. Where are you supposed to look? Supermarkets are generally quite reliable, but sometimes there's more flavour and authenticity in a village market. Such a smorgasbord and yet you never know how to go about approaching it.
3) As with many other things, cheese has a best before date. Get married by 30. Any time after that and you're a spinster bomb waiting to go off.
4) Following from last point, that means that as soon as you acquire cheese, there's this pressure to eat it gnawing away at you. Especially if you're nearing the best before date. But what if you'd like another cheese instead? Acks! No time! Take what you have or risk it for something new?


5) Stay with a cheese long enough without taking proper precautions and it'll spawn mold (whether you planned it or not). Said mold will leech off you for ages and ages until it's old enough to create its own lifeform. Kids have a funny way of doing that.
6) Cheese is as good as the cow that made the milk its from and the stuff they put in while making it. Family is important - as much as you're not marrying them, they become in-laws. Some psychological trauma you can't foresee in a partner until later on.
7) Too much cheese will give you a heart attack.

A Collection of Thoughts...

1) No, i'm not bitter about not being able to go to Phuket - wonderful company, beautiful beaches, pubs and clubs, kayaking, cheap shopping, water sports and all. Why did i mope at home all day? Just 'cos I wanted to. Geez, you jump to conclusions.


2) About a year ago, when i declared to my dad i wanted to go clubbing, he retorted "You want to go to that sinful place?" A year on and I just fixed him a gin sour which he said tasted good. Did i mention he hasn't objected to my fancies of becoming a bartender? (who will undoubtedly work in said sinful place) Kudos to JoLim for remembering that piece of history. Sinful indeed.

Oh, you crazy Swiss bully. Fortunately you're a nice man. And UNICEF ambassador.

3) Federer is superhuman. He's just... incredible, stupendous, amazing, not of this world. Well, at least today he was. Watching the semi-finals of the Australian Open against Roddick was somewhat inhumane. As Vijay Singh said "Someone's made a complaint against Federer. The Anti-Cruelty Society will be on the case shortly". I get what he means though. A 6-4, 6-0, 6-2 thrashing was just mean. At the top level nonetheless. I'm not a tennis aficionado but if ever anyone wanted to learn every move in the book and its perfect execution, it would have to be from Federer's performance today.

Microsoft Paint is NOT my forte. This took me ages on my mouseless computer so you better appreciate my aching wrist's efforts at drawing a clear and concise diagram.

4) The Malaysian Immigration Department (come on, you knew it was gonna come up) is the right hand. The Citizenship Department is the left hand. The government is the head. Now, the right hand doesn't know what the left hand is doing. In fact, the right hand's thumb doesn't even know what it's middle finger is doing (which, if i had my way, would be making rude gestures to the head). There is no large common database (not even with our brilliant MSC) that binds the departments together. And, they don't even trust documents from one department to the next. As far as proving your citizenship to the immigration department goes, your MyKad counts for shits.
So, the head has to get its act together, stop wasting money on building hopelessly complicated roads for its needlessly large government complex ala Putrajaya, and spend the money :
a) coordinating between it's departments so that public service actually has a meaning.
b) filling potholes (any Malaysian driver will probably agree)
c) helping flood victims
d) sprucing up the irrigation system so we wouldn't have so many flood victims
e) all of the above.

Hhmmm.. if i don't get my passport, i think we'll all know why.

To Sir With Love

Dear Immigration Department,

fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark citizenship fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark borang fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark 6 months fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark putrajaya fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark twice in a day fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark interview fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark inefficient fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark bitch fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark on leave fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark phuket fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark fark

Yours without Ctrl+C,

Stranded.

My Life's Calling

Ironically, in a football match which didn't concern my team and which i fell asleep in (only towards the end, my eyes refused to open!), it dawned on me what my life's calling would be.
It's perfect. Brilliant.
Actually, it's just an amalgamation of everything I think i'm good at or fancy at the moment.
I will be... ~insert drumroll here~
A copywriter who works from home (or her laptop, rather) therefore allowing the flexibility of being a tour guide (travelling, naturally) which would be an excellent platform for the expansion of her photographic capacities.
*phew*
In short, a copywriting tour guide photographer.
Because not many people know what a copywriter does (being the least known of the jobs), a copywriter writes (gosh) stuff for media - print, radio, tv or otherwise.
i figure malaysia has atrocious english, i could probably slot myself in somewhere. So, copywriting for the money, and cos i'm good with words.
A tour guide for the travelling.
And the photos because I just developed a whole bunch that I can't believe i took with my own two hands (and camera of course). I think i spent too long choosing them because now i'm starting to see the rest of the world as photos waiting to be taken.

The Three Sisters, Katoomba (Australia)

Dromana, Mornington Peninsula (Australia)
Credits: CC for modelling; Nemo for being found

King's Canyon, Central Australia

Base Walk at Uluru [Ayers Rock], Central Australia

Circular Quay, Sydney

Murray River, Echuca (Australia)

Uluwatu Temple [Temple on the Cliff] , Bali

Table Mountain, Cape Town (South Africa)

Maybe one day i'll regret putting all my nice pictures up ready for people to pilfer. But anyhow, for everyone's viewing pleasure. Now imagine what I could do if i actually learned how to play with the settings of my camera? Or got an SLR even?
Well, we can all dream.
Until then, I have to figure out how to fit bartending in my career plan. Maybe just for personal pleasure...

Conspiracy of Bureaucracy

I can swear to you this country doesn't want me to get my passport.
I would gladly let that thief have all the cash that was in that bag and even the souvenir t-shirts that we just bought if he could just return the passports. It's really not worth all the hassle to get them back.
We applied for the passports right after Christmas. So far, it's been 3 weeks.
The thing is, it seems quite straightforward really. Our passports got stolen. We apply for a new one, bringing along relevant documentation - identification card, birth certificate, old passports. BUT, if you were born before Malaysian independence in 1957, you need to have a certificate of citizenship. Apparently back then there was a clause that if your father has the certificate, then his children are automatically counted as citizens too. Apparently they got rid of that clause a while back. So, my mum - with her IC, birth cert and old passports - is an uncertified citizen of Malaysia.
Not only that, they can't process everything at the same place.
i rue the day they moved into the fancy offices in Putrajaya.

Road leading to the main street (i think). Putrajaya is humongous. And the signs are terribly confusing.

The bridge is pretty impressive too. So grand while you're driving in. Imagine it would be pretty at night.

Don't get me wrong. It's probably one of the latest greatest testaments to Malaysian architecture. (although the streets are very confusing. you don't know which part you can drive on and which part you can walk on)
However, first class facilities, third class service.
We have been shuttled around - immigration office in Damansara --> Citizenship Department in Putrajaya --> Identity Card Office in Putrajaya --> Citizenship Department in Putrajaya..
You get the idea.
One of the headlines in the newspaper today was that In the future, passports can be processed in 2 hours with your Identity Card. Farking minister has to crack that joke at us too.
What i don't get is that the new identity card is meant to be super up-to-date - containing all your details, even health records and bank details in the future. The government spent millions converting everyone's card to this new fandangled technology - so that the public has a multipurpose card for security and convenience. Mum shows it to them to verify she's Malaysian and it's not enough. Not even with a birth certificate.
Look who doesn't trust their own technology.
Farking bastards. And they have the audacity to plant the hope that we can get stuff settled quickly. I honestly thought we could go for the interview at the immigration department today (to make sure we're not selling our passports on the black market) but now that they've processed the application for my mum's citizenship, she has to wait another week for them to PRINT OUT A FARKING CERTIFICATE AND GET IT SIGNED.
With such "efficiency" it's a wonder that our country can progress at all. What wasted hours just driving around sorting out meaningless red tape. Anyone who lives here can agree that it's not just when you lose your passport. Should i even mention the number of times he's been on his minum break when we call. Just once, cos when you call 2 hours later the dude's still not back. Mind you he's already out at 10 am.
GGGGRRRrrrRRRrrRRr.......... think happy thoughts. Maybe next time we'll just have barcodes tattooed to our heads and save the trouble of having something to lose.
But they'd probably find some way to tell us we have to apply for a new head before they can verify the old one.
*snort*
i want to go to Phuket....

The REAL Cicakman

I'm sorry - it's a great picture. I couldn't resist. =)

Idea of the day - the cock sock

Looking through my photos from the year and picking what to develop, i came across some gems that needed to be shared with the world. Do you know what this is?That, my friends, is a cock sock. Does it sound crude? Well, i promise you i didn't make the name up. We came across this in Central Australia; the Flying Doctor Service in Alice Springs to be precise. What does one do with it? Literally, use it to cover your cock. (not the one that crows, unless you like that sort of stuff of course)
It's not entirely vulgar, the cock sock is really a noble idea. Some ladies at a Rotary Club (or some other benevolent organisation of the sort) thought of it to raise funds for the Flying Doctors. They got men to come in for fittings (haha... embarrassing) and knitted the little cock socks for them. Then, the men had to wear them and could be challenged at any time to see if they were donning said sock. If not, they had to pay a fine. And that, my friends, is how grown men got to stare at other grown mens' genitalia with a valid excuse AND raise funds for a good cause at the same time.
Commemmorated forever in a museum in Alice Springs.
Have you had a good idea today?

p.s: i don't know if that one we're pointing at was used but i didn't chance touching it anyway.

Music for any mood...

Music was my refuge. I could crawl into the space between the notes and curl my back to loneliness.

~Maya Angelou, Gather Together in My Name

Stay by Lisa Loeb



You say, i only hear what i want to
You say, i talk so all the time
So

And i thought what i felt was simple
And i thought that i don't belong
And now that i am leaving
Now i know that i did something wrong cos i missed you
Yeah, i missed you

You say, i only hear what i want to
I don't listen hard
I don't pay attention to the distance that you're running
Or to anyone, anywhere
I don't understand if you really care
I'm only hearing negative
No, no, no

So i
Turn the radio on
Turn the radio up
And this woman was singing my song
Lovers in love and the other's run away
Lover is crying cos the other won't stay
Some of us hover when we're weeping for the other
Who was dying since the day they were born
Well, this is not that
I think that i'm throwing but i'm thrown

And i thought i'd live forever
But now i'm not so sure
You try to tell me that i'm clever
But that won't take me anyhow, or anywhere
With you

You said that i was naive
And i thought that i was strong
I thought hey i can leave, i can leave oh
But now i know that i was wrong
Cos i missed you
Yeah, i missed you

You said you caught me cos you want me
One day you'll let me go
You try to give away a keeper
Or keep me cos you know
You're just so scared to lose

And you say
Stay

You say, i only hear what i want to

Country of the day - Bolivia

Bolivia is not, as i previously thought, in Europe (or anywhere near it for that matter), but is part of South America.

That would probably explain why they have llamas in Bolivia...

and lush rainforests....


and volcanic-looking mountains and lakes...


They speak Spanish in Bolivia, as well as Aymara and Quecha (???). Nope, not a language called Bolivian. The currency in Bolivia is the Boliviano and 2.36 Bolivianos is equivalent to 1 Malaysian Ringgit [as of 13th January 2007 according to OANDA currency converter]. The administrative capital is La Paz and the legislative capital is Sucre (like the guy in Prison Break!) i think Sucre also means something sexy in some language cos typing sucre in google images comes up with random pictures and the city itself only at around number 11. Sucre does look like a nice kind of place though.

cobble-stoned street unshamedly ripped off from here

Dude leaning over pretty view ripped off from here

Beautiful beach picture ripped off from here

There is also a city called Cochabamba with inhabitants called Cochabambinos.
I know this because Cochabamba is in the news. For having violence break out as there's dissent from the upper classes (and state governers), particularly aimed towards President Eva Morales; in office for just about a year. When a righteous president comes into power and tries to redistribute wealth, trouble is abound.


I hope it wasn't just me who thought Bolivia was somewhere in Eastern or Central Europe. *blush* And here I am hoping to become a tour guide. What atrocious geography!

p.s: if you also didn't know about Bolivia, please leave a comment so I don't feel so dum dum.

pps: Everything here I learned off google and wikipedia so please don't expect 100% accurate facts!

I believe that children are our future

If you want a child-friendly house, do not:

1. Have lots and lots of staircases
2. Have various glass and jade items on display
3. Have furniture with sharp corners
4. Come to my house

First time our house was tested, 2 naughty little boys and 1 naughty little girl (all cousins) came over after dinner. What did they do? In the words of my little cousin Thomas:

"I'm exploring the world!"

Result: 1 broken coffee stand, 2 hyper boys, 1 tired che che.

How did our parents do it?
Makes us realise that we've got to be a bit more considerate in decking out the new house. What about my soon to be married brothers kids eh?

End with a thought
Whitney Houston said "I believe that children are our future, teach them well and let them lead the way". She was a wonderful role model, until she became a drug addict.

It's so hard to find good help nowadays....

The trouble with girlfriends is that they get boyfriends.

Jeannie Foo, January 11th 2007.

It's true. Girlfriends forget you once they get attached. It's a mean statement, i'm not trying to be bitter. But it's true! Once they're attached, they don't need you for social support - driver, escort and bodyguard already present. Can't beat the 3 in 1 deal.

i wanted to put a picture of the ultimate boyfriend, so i googled that and they came up with how to change your boyfriend into a toad kits. so i thought i'd put my ultimate boyfriend. although he looks kinda like a sleazy pimp in this picture. oh well. wentworth miller *drool*

Maybe it's the same for boyfriends who get girlfriends. I haven't had the misfortune of my nearest and dearest guy friends getting girlfriends yet. Should i really be happy about that? I'd probably break down if i couldn't bug sing, or eugene, or sujen for fear of pissing off the girlfriends. Luckily single birds flock together?
Okaylah, i'll join the club when i get a boyfriend. But 'til then, i'm still a bitter, single friend who needs like-minded single girlfriend. Then i can grumble about other people going off with their boyfriends privately.

Thoughts provoked by Leo di Caprio

Do you know what a blood diamond is? Not a diamond the colour of blood. Not just that movie that I watched that stars Leonardo di Caprio. Wikipedia says a blood diamond is 'a diamond mined in a war zone and sold, usually clandestinely, in order to finance an insurgent or invading army's war efforts.'
In a nut shell, wars need money. Diamonds get money. Diamonds get money to fund wars.
then again...
Wars get labour. Labour gets diamonds. Wars get labour to get diamonds.
Hhhmmm.....
It's a vicious cycle of war, labour and diamonds which supposedly isn't happening in the world today. Where there's money to be made, i doubt it though.
I really recommend the movie Blood Diamond. di Caprio did a really great job, and his accent is reminiscent of the South African experience, but the portrayal of conflict diamonds in the movie is excellent. If not for a great eye-opener, then at least for a good action movie.
I hope you check it out and take something out of it.
If you're interested in reading up about blood diamonds, this blog sums it up pretty well.

war-torn Angola (1999)

child soldiers in Sierra Leone

Children forced to leave their families and homes by rebel forces to commit horrendous atrocities. It was literally kill or be killed. Many of them never found their families after the war.

war victims in Sierra Leone

reunion after years of fighting against their own people.

Sometimes the world sickens you : child soldiers, civil wars, broken families, the burning down of entire villages.
We've got to believe that there's more good out there.

For greater insight into what's happening in Liberia, you can find a great photo essay by Teun Voeten of the World Press Review here. I'm glad it's in black and white because some images are pretty graphic. Reading up on Liberia, it seems US has a part to play too. Liberia is a Latin name, meaning 'Land of the Free', precisely what it was for newly freed African American slaves. They were sent back to Africa and needless to say could not assimmilate completely into African culture, choosing to adopt American ways and calling themselves 'Americans'. These 'Americans' consolidated the upper class of Liberian society, monopolising trade and contributing to the wealth disparity. Ironically enough, some of these newly freed 'American' slaves found it necessary to dominate the uncivilized and inferior 'natives'. How fast one forgets...

Feng Shui Shmeng Shui (i hate that book)

So the house has been abuzz with talk of marriage and weddings, and dates... Dates, dates, dates. If one has not already surmised, I am not getting married, but my eldest brother. I pity the poor boy. And, I have found the manifestation of evil.


I hate this book. I hate it with a passion.
That book is the single greatest cause of misery in my household.
My father has gone somewhat overboard in his tyrannical hold over the wedding feng shui. I pity my brother, truly i do.
It's a centuries old tradition. Of course I don't really believe in it, but I also don't want to do anything that might jeapordise their happiness, right?
Oh, alright dad. Yeah, let's listen to some star-reading (or whatever it is they do) fellas who tell us in the book that it will be an ABSOLUTELY terrible day to get married. Anywhere in the world, for ANY couple - on that day. Oh, and that (probably unmarried) scholar says we should have the tea ceremony between 3pm and 5pm on that day? Alright.
Here's the thing, not everyday is a Sunday. Literally. Well, maybe Saturday in this case. Maybe then all this Chinese almanac stuff isn't practical enough for the modern world. People have to work, hotels have to be booked (and overbooked), some of us have to fly back from Melbourne.
But okay, I get the whole tradition thing. I don't claim to understand it, but i get it. We've been doing it for centuries, let's continue. The problem is when you try to over-trivialise the affair.

This day is fine. The book says you can get married that day.
Next day: I spoke to my friend, he knows these things. He says it's better to do it another day.
Day after: The book says that wedding is good on Saturday, but only come into the house the next Thursday, and have the tea ceremony the following Monday.

Are you lost yet? Yeah, welcome to my house. I hate that book.
Does it help that my father is unnaturally high-strung, especially when you mention the wedding. He starts raising his voice, refuses to listen to anyone else and seems set to be obstinate from the outset. Does it help that noone else can read that farking book? I hate that book.
When did a wedding have to be more complicated than a boy and a girl, wanting to show the world they love each other. Wanting all their family and friends to be around when they do it. And choosing when and where they want to do it.
Gawd, even the guest list is like my parents' excuse to gloat to other people with unmarried children. Or that's what i feel. Just 'cos they got to invite friends and I didn't. *snort* But it's not my parade (technically not theirs either)

In any case, feng shui almanacs... especially that evil Chinese one that I can't even read to try and help my brother out with ... are just that. Evil beyond comprehension. I'm not trying to be an uber-modernist now. I love my traditional family dinners and celebrating Guo Dong and various other ceremonies that have no meaning to me. But come on, let's have some flexible tradition? Honestly, this nonsense is enough to make you feel like an uncivilised, boorish, superstitious bogan.

Did i mention? I hate that book.

If anyone is curious as to how it works out. Strangely enough, my brother finally got an opening at one of the hotels. (they were all fully booked before) and he confirmed that. And my dad relented with a defiant, So you don't want to follow the book, issit? God bless my mother when she said, No, don't want.
p.s: she's going away for the weekend.

Pleasant Little Suprises

~if not interested in reading many names which you wouldn't know, skip to moral at the end~

Dengue fever fiasco over... Today was the first day that i've been out of the house the WHOLE year! haha.. sorry lah, i guess drama is something i can't kick.
Anyway, decided to throw all recovery caution to the wind (despite the nagging feeling i still have a mild fever) and took up the Stellarians' offer to go out to Maisons on Asian Heritage Row. Why? 3 good reasons (in my mind)
1) i needed to get out of the house! emotionally unstable for various reasons
2) i've never been to Asian Heritage Row!
3) Last chance to see Chee for probably the next year. *sigh* evil unsynchronised holiday times...
So Sujen and I naturally were the first there, naturally the ones who had to wait for others with a drink at the mamak and naturally still had to wait outside the club (albeit minus the indecision of where to go this time)
First surprise of the night, a very disctinctive loud voice coupled with an even more distinctive figure - lo and behold .... PV!!! Good to see him after hearing his drunken/hangover shenanigans online.. Been 2 years!
Next up, I glimpse Suddy walking by, followed by .. Tom Foreman! I knew he would be in town from Melbourne but never planned to meet him there.. and haven't seen him for a year. Also, pleasant surprise.
Haha, then Terence and I are talking and I mention mutual friend Matthew. We both spend time discussing why he has fallen out of favour and lo and behold! Matthew appears! I took the liberty of just avoiding contact all night although really, i don't know why.
Various other people I can't be bothered mentioning 'cos i couldn't be bothered saying Hi to.
Later into the night, coming back from the overheated (but much better than freaking Thai Cowboy) dancefloor, see someone glimpse at me and then turn around as i pass by. Was it? Yes it was... Weng Lum! Pah... studying for exam my arse. Engineers are all the same all over the world. haha.. Party now, cram later. =)
On top of that, saw LG Chee after about 3 months, saw Goatie Wern Jin after about 2 years!, saw my Buddy Lee after about 1 month, Tracy after about 1 year, Ling Foong after ... a while, and Sookie after about 2 months! haha... oh well, regardless, those people have a special place somewhere. Except maybe Goat.

Moral: There are only so many nightspots in KL that people congregate to. Once in a while, it's nice to see who you can catch up with, cos it's still nice feeling that the world is a small place. But i can't do it everyday - the smoke is just too much.

Hello 2007

Maybe it was 2006's way to give me a final kick - if i'm leaving, i'm dragging you down with me. In any case, i inexplicably woke up on the last day of the year, shivering. i was nearly delusional, half believing my dream for a good 15 minutes. Finally had the sense to take 2 panadols and sleep it off til later. The doctor had the good sense to tell me that i had a 40 degree temperature and also that if i didn't get better in 2 days, it could be dengue fever. now there's a nice thought.
I guess it wasn't too bad. Other than the aches and weak shivers, sweatiness and lack of energy, not many people can claim to sleeping all day and having their food brought to them, right?
Anyway, i think the dengue call's off 'cos my fever broke today. Still not feeling top of the world, but that's no reason not to welcome in the new year. Sorry it wasn't in any grand fashion, but Hello 2007! all the same. May every day of the year only be better. (goodness knows it would be hard pressed to be much worse)